It has been a long time since I have blogged but honestly feeling like I need to start it up again. There is so much on my heart I feel the Lord wants to share. I feel Him calling me to write. Our heart has many facets to it. I read back at some off these post and I can see much growth and maturity. When His heart begins to beat in ours our perspective changes what use to matter has grown so dim. The matters of the heart thrust us forward or keeps us in a rut. It helps us to grow or stunts our growth. Would you join me on this journey ??

Wake up!

Stay awake, and pray that you won't be tempted. You want to do what's right, but you're weak." Matthew 26 : 41 Gods word translation 

My heart is heavy for the CHURCH and this world. I have sought God out and have had to repent for my hopelessness in this season. With a book a friend gave me called The watchmen prayer by Dutch Sheets and my husbands unfailing strength and words about prayer my heart began to understand what God is wanting us to do in these last days. Oh it isnt to sit by, to keep ourselves protected  in our church, and watch those around us go to hell... It isnt even to live a good life and sit around listening to good messages ...




No its about PRAYER and seeking after God and calling down HIS will for this messed up place. Its to be a true BRIDE who wants to see HIS love poured forth and to see HIS will done on the earth as it is in heaven. Not to sit in a place of "IM a good christian thats all I need to do" 


The CHURCH has fallen asleep thinking its peace and safety. When its time to war for our families, ministries, the lost, America, for one another, REVIVAL! 




Its time to rise up and start speaking forth His word to set people free to save the lost and to turn this nation back to HIM! Let us not stay silent and think His will is just going to happen. We need to take a stand and stop being so self seeking. We are His children who should know His heart. Have you sought HIM out about what is coming to prepare the way? To be able to be a safe heaven for those who dont know Him?


 Or do you think you will not be here and waiting for the rapture to take you home? Our Father needs us to be listening to HIM and to do what needs to be done before He returns... There is a harvest out there and the fields are white and ready. Will you go and do HIS will?


As for me... I must go forth ... Peoples lives depend on it and my Father is waiting for us to carry out HIS will!!!!!

We are beautifuly unique !!!

When we look at ourselves in the mirror, what do we see? Do we even know the time and grace it took to create us ? The beauty that we were designed by? It doesn't matter what flaws we see or what we don't like about ourselves. Its what HE sees, its what HE creates that lies within us. He placed HIS loving hands upon you and formed you as you were created in the womb. He took special interest in the heart of who you are and what HE created you to be. What we look at as weakness and what the world looks at as junk or not politically correct HE looks at as beauty from HIS heart... Yes there are things that has changed the course of the path of who we are... abuse, negative words, wrong relationships, etc that has formed who people wanted us to be... BUT there is that beautiful child who is so deep within us that GOD has created and wants them to come forth in all that HE has designed for you. What happened in life has not changed who HE created,that person is still inside of you. It takes us walking away from what the world,mothers,fathers,people have spoke over us and tried to mold us into someone we were not created to be. No matter what has happened, no matter how old you are does not change the plans HE has for you or who HE has longed for you to be. Its the true you who no one sees when you are by yourself and who you have longed to be... Its that little girl who dances before her heavenly Father with all her might.... Its that little girl who heart breaks at the sight of the hurting... Its the one who looks for her identity because hers was lost in someone else plans... Is the one who searches to be validated.... the one who has lost everything and is afraid.... HE knows us and knows what is needed... Oh how HE longs to hold you close so you can breath,feel safe,rest.... Let us run to HIM and embrace who we really are... Let us let go of our thoughts of who we were and who we should be and allow HIS plan to come forth... It is a beautiful plan that only you can do .... That you were designed for... LET YOUR TRUE SELF OUT... let your  true beauty come forth 

The gift of relationship

In any relationship it takes nurturing and time to make it grow. Even in our relationship with God. Sometimes life becomes to busy and demanding for us and we get caught up in the stress  of the day to slow down and look at the beautiful gift God has given us in people HE has hand picked for our lives. Maybe its that strength we need at a certain time or that smile that always seems to be there to reassure us of HIS love and their love. Or the unfailing times of a listening ear that helps us get through a weary day. God has ordained people to be in our lives before the foundation of the world. It was HIS plan that NO ONE be a lone ranger. Where would we be if Our spouse, family, friends.etc where not in our lives? Sometimes we take for granted that they will always be there. Sometimes we dont even give a thought to what they do for us. Take a moment... have you said "I love you" lately? Have you given them words of encouragement to let them know you are thankful? Dont wait another day... Tomorrow never comes... and dont think for a moment that they dont need to hear from you how you appreciate them and how much you need them.  So many times we wait to express our feelings and precious time is wasted. We ignore the beautiful gift and it begins to die from lack of nutrients. Witch are your LOVE, TIME, words of ENCOURAGEMENT, a SMILE, TENDER WORD, your EMBRACE, HUG, and the list goes on... Dont lose yourself in giving all your nutrients to what God has not asked you to do. You will end up withering down your spirit and dieing from the lack of water and food HE has prepared you! Your life is too precious to just throw away on the wrong people who suck the life and nutrients that were given to you! Look around you and see that the LORD is good!!!   

In our weakness HE is made strong

I have wanted to write for a long time. Maybe a book or something that I could share my heart and what the LORD has put on my heart BUT 1 thing always stopped me.... Dyslexia... I didnt want my weakness to be shown or look stupid cause I write my words backwards or get words messed up some times. So I just sat back and waited and my heart was in such turmoil because I knew what God wanted me to do....Until one day God showed me that even in this, He could use this for His glory and I needed to embrace the beauty of my uniqueness ....  I needed to stop running and hold fast to the beauty of who I was and stop looking at the short comings of my humanness and look to my Heavenly Father for what I was lacking... So what if I dont spell words right or not in the right order does that change the meaning from my heart? From HIS heart? NO what matters is that we remain obedient and step forward into what He has called us too and let His life shine through ours! Its in the moments that things are not perfect that His life is shown and His love is poured forth.. Its not our abilities that He is longing for its our openness to be obedient to what He has called us too... So today I come to you and say... Rise up no more excuses!!! Reach for what He is calling you to do and know He will equip you for the tasks ahead!!! 

Heart wreching retaility of our parents as we get older!

How I wish I could turn back the clock to when I was little and everything was so simple and my father was still well and was the hard working man of our family. How hard it is still to this day to see him in a nursing home and not being able to take care of himself. Oh we tried to take care of him at home. My sister took him in after his girlfriend had died and there was many years of silence between us all. He had a stroke many years ago and had kept us at arms length. He became very distant and withdrew from our tattered family.  After years of being married to our mother he decided to take a different path to life and our family suffered. I became angry and bitter at his careless acts of LOVE for his kids. How could he walk away and be with another women and not want anything to do with his kids? My heart was broken and shattered. The man I once looked up to and longed to have a relationship with was nothing but a distant memory. My sisters and brothers moved on and I had not seen or talked to my dad in years until there was a house fire that killed his girlfriend and burned him on his hands and face. I will never forget that long drive as my sisters and I took to go be with him in this time of mourning. I was a Christian now and really prayed  for strength as we were gonna see are dad after many years of silence. As we walked up to the door my heart was racing would he let us into this world that we were not apart of? Would he want us to comfort him? As the door opened and I saw this man once strong and proud, hurt and crushed and in that moment my heart was filled with compassion for him and I wanted to hold him and take away all his pain and misery. He let us in and ended up moving back by us. I wish the story ended here and we lived happily ever after but it doesn't.  We thought everything would fall into place and he would be happy only to find that our father that we once knew was not the man that stood before us. His life had taken him down a path of heartache and pain and we could not heal those wounds. He has chosen to keep all his anger and pain and still keep us at arms length. Oh how my heart has hurt for him and how I want to hold him and tell him to let it all go. But the harsh reality is we cant. He is the one choosing to be the way he is and to hold onto all the things that has caused him to become a bitter man. My prayer for him is this... Father God wrap him in your arms and let him see YOUR love for him that YOU can take away all his pain, all his disappointments.  I pray Father God that he finds YOUR salvation and turns from his own way in Jesus name! He is still here on the earth and hope has filled my heart that one day he will see the truth and embrace it with everything he is. But until then we pray and seek strength from our Heavenly Father as HE takes our hands and walks us through this tough season of our lives.... HIS love is what binds us together and keeps us strong... NEVER give up hope and always trust in the heart of your HEAVENLY Father!!! His love will always remain no matter what.

Protecting your inner self

As I have grown up and faced some heartache and seen people suffer, I cant stop to think of what God must feel to see His creation( US) bruised and broken and just surviving... When He gave His life so we could live abundantly .... HIS heart is so broken for YOU and the dreams that have been crushed! Sometimes I feel as if everything we do in life is just a moment that is in time where we just go about doing and not seeing what He See's... I have learned to know that we can exhale and believe for good things... So many times we are going through life holding are breath and waiting for the next disappointment... Not enjoying our life to the fullest and taking in HIS love for us and others... Its as if our heart has a gaping hole in it and only hurt and pain can abide there... Take a moment and breath in HIS goodness... Just be silent in HIS presence and hear that still small voice..... Let His heart strengthen yours... And guard your heart relentlessly  from all the things that war against your soul!!! The negative words that have followed you your whole life... the feeling of not measuring up to what people think you should be... The disappointments of yesterday .... The words of loved ones who have walked away... HIS love is real and true and only wants the best for you... Somewhere deep down you have to trust in HIS heart for you and see yourself through HIS eyes... He created you for a divine beautiful purpose and wants you to be intimate with HIM and build a relationship with HIM... He know your hurts,pain,frustration,etc.... He is longing to spend time with you... Yeah YOU... The creator of everything longs for your company!! Dont doubt it for a minute... YOU ARE SPECIAL ... You were fearfully and wonderfully made!!!